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0 comments / Posted by Alyssa Wolfe

People are consistently telling me that  Harry has me wrapped around his little finger. “You would have never let the girls do that, he is so spoiled, you just give him whatever he wants, aren't you going to stop him?.” I have also heard the “oh it’s because he is your boy or he is the baby.” Let me clear something up right now. It is NONE of those things. It is true I barely look up at the dinner table when he throws food at his sisters.  I only take away his crayons and roll my eyes when I find him coloring on the walls for the 10th time in a day. It's 8am and he is sitting on the couch right now eating sugar and watching TV.  All this is not because he is spoiled or a boy or even the baby. People it is because I have 3 KIDS. Did you hear me? THERE ARE THREE OF THEM!!!! I am out numbered. I am pretty sure that if they ganged up they could take me.  The only thing that keeps me from being killed in my sleep is that these kids can’t get along long enough to work together. I am tired.

My days are full of “MOMMY I need water, I am hungry, Harry pooped, where are my shoes, what’s for dinner, I need help, she took that from me, he hit me,  the toilet flooded the bathroom again.” I don’t spoil the kids.  I have just given up. Three kids means that at least once a day everyone will be yelling at you for something or crying and in these moments it is like they are multiplying. They are like wet gremlins that right before your eyes have grown into an army of small snotty people who are thirsty and hungry and screaming and it’s your fault. If that were not enough to make you feel like your life was out of control think about the sheer mess that is made by 5 people in a family. If all my family took everything they were wearing off at the same time it means I have a full load of laundry to do. Don’t believe me?  Take 5 pair of PJ’s, 4 underwear, 4 cloth diapers, and 5 sets of clothing from the next 3 kids and 2 adults you see and I guarantee you can fill a laundry basket. Yeah, see what I am talking about.

People who are about to go from 2 kids to 3 will always ask what it is like and usually I lie and say “oh it’s fine….not a big deal at all”. I choose to lie because it’s too late for them and really I don’t think the truth helps in this situation. However, before I had kids of my own I was given a lot of advise but there are only two little jewels of wisdom I received that still helps me on a daily basis:

  1. There are only so many things one person can keep alive. Figure out what your limit is and say goodbye to everything that is not required by law for you to keep. This means if the houseplants and fish are going to die so that you can keep your kids alive.  Don’t feel bad about dumping that cactus in the trash (or letting hamsters out into the backyard in the dead of winter……)
  2. A lot of people are going to give you parenting advice. Use what works for you and say F*&# it to the rest
  3. (My personal piece of wisdom)-Do whatever you have to do to get through the day with everyone alive and emotionally UN-scarred for life. Don’t worry about what other people think. Your kids are yours to screw up. It is your God given right for giving them life to be able to screw them up a little. Most importantly though, never, under any circumstances take all of them by yourself to the grocery store.

So there is the sad ugly truth. I have a full time family and a full time job and I am tired full time.

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